Bad News: The UK is Blocking Free Porn. Good News: You Can Unlock it Simply By Giving Them All Your Personal Information
Source – WATCHING free porn in Britain is about to get a lot trickier thanks to new rules that aim to protect children from online smut.
As early as next month, porn sites will be required to get proof of ID from UK residents before showing any X-rated clips.
That includes free porn sites like PornHub and YouPorn – which attract nearly 2billion visits a month between them worldwide.
They’ll join a number of other sites in using the AgeID system, which requires users to verify their age via an official form of ID such as a driver’s license or passport. …
When someone first clicks on a site, they’ll be asked to register with AgeID and verify their age using a Mobile SMS, credit card, passport, or driving licence.
Users will then be able to use their AgeID username or password to access all porn sites that use AgeID – though some may use different age verification systems.
If you’ve ever wondered why people left the most powerful and secure kingdom in the history of the world – so vast it could accurately be said “the sun never sets on the British Empire” – in order to cross an ocean in rickety boats and scratch out an existence in a hostile and unforgiving wilderness, here’s your reason.
And that doesn’t just go for the Brits themselves. This is why wretched refuse from around the world crawled to our teeming shores. It’s why my ancestors came here to work shit jobs hauling dead bodies around for the Medical Examiner in a city of blueblood Brahmans who hated them. Because while they could never have anticipated unlimited free porn, they knew that if it ever came to be invented, America would never try to tell everyone they couldn’t have it. Even if are a country that was settled by judgmental busybodies with buckles on their hats.
What a great plan by the British government. Hey, no one is saying you can’t watch all the porn you want! We just 5 Euros, is all! And … a record of who you are. And we insist on having your official government IDs logged into a database. That we’ll have access to. We’re not saying anyone is going to keep track of what you’re jerking to. Or when. Or how often. But we’re not saying we’re not, either. You’ll just have to trust us that no anonymous bureaucrat is going to threaten to let your fiance’s parents know you’ve got a routine of searching “Asian Big Naturals” and spending 15 minutes on it every morning after she leaves for work unless you pay him to keep quiet.
This is what we declared independence from. It wasn’t about tea taxes or no representation or having to let Redcoats stay in your home. I mean it was about those things a little bit. But it was more about having the basic liberty to rub one out whenever and to whatever you want. You think for one second Ben Franklin wouldn’t have cranked it to the “French MILF” videos on PornHub? Or that Thomas Jefferson wouldn’t have been a regular visitor to YouPorn’s “Interracial” page?
In the good old U.S. of A., we don’t want Big Brother controlling our porn consumption. When we protect our under-18 population from adult content they’re too young for, we leave it up to their parents to monitor their online viewing and set parental controls. Which they don’t, because nobody knows how. So we ignore it. And just hope for the best. And it seems to be working out just fine. At least we don’t let the government get in the way of our free and unfettered enjoyment. That’s the American Way. I’d say “Enjoy living in tyranny, Brits.” But I know enjoying anything over there is about to get much, much harder.